Wednesday, June 26, 2013

Insights I Gained From ARP Tonight.

Does any of this sound or feel familiar?

-Many who have suffered from addiction feel a sense of isolation.
-Many who have suffered have kept many things to themselves-shameful things, embarrassing things, heartbreaking things, things that make them feel vulnerable.

I can relate to these things so strongly right now. They come straight from the ARP manual at the beginning of Step 5. Tonight in my ARP group we were focused on Step 5. Interestingly enough, even though I am not on Step 5 yet officially, I feel that this message is exactly what I needed to hear tonight. 

I needed to be reminded that my feelings of isolation are part of this experience. And I am not alone in these feelings. And yes, I am keeping certain things to myself that are shameful and make me feel vulnerable...but I am only keeping them to myself when appropriate. I have not kept them from the Lord, my bishop or my therapists. Sharing those things with group members or others in my life would not be appropriate for me (My best friend knows quite a bit too - she is that "extremely trustworthy person in word and deed" it talks about in Step 5).

I think it is interesting that the manual says (in Step 5) we confess to the Lord, the bishop if necessary and a "trusted person to whom we could disclose the exact nature of our wrongs".  Nowhere in this step does it say I need to disclose my wrongs to my family, friends, ward members, co-workers or acquaintances. 

Of course, if I have hurt them, I need to apologize and seek forgiveness. In fact, that is taken care of in Step 8 when I seek forgiveness from those I have harmed and I am willing to make restitution to them. Then in Step 9,  I take the step to make that restitution to others if possible.  I love what is says in Step 9 about making amends, "If they give you the chance to apologize, be brief and specific about the situation you remember. Details are not necessary. The purpose is not to explain or describe your side of things." 

Wow...that is powerful stuff. I love how all the steps tie together so smoothly. I am humbled by the gentle nudges that the Addiction Recovery Program provides for my path to healing. This path of healing is different for every single person, however, the guidelines are the same. 

I am thankful that the Lord has set forth the guidelines to help me be successful in my recovery so that it can bring a complete change to my heart and my life. I know that as I ask the Lord for help, He will give me courage and strength. I need courage and strength right now as I work the steps, strive to make good choices in all areas of my life, and look for ways to serve others. I can't imagine overcoming this addiction and the challenges in the other areas of my life without the gospel principles and without the love of God. 


2 comments:

  1. Great insights about step 5 :) you're awesome!

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  2. I love that phrase in Step 5. When I first read it, I though "Oh my word! THAT'S why I always felt so alone in a group!" Awesome moment! Thanks for sharing your insights. :)

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